PROBLEMS, your greatest asset. The greatest way to change your life.
Published: Feb 6th, 22:23
Last Updated: Feb 11th, 22:43
PROBLEMS, your greatest asset. The greatest way to change your life.
Last night I had dinner with one of my closest friends who is a phenominal comedian and a great person. As we started talking, he told me that he was really bummed out that he had not booked a tv show that comedians go on. Aside from the fact that he is clearly ready for this show, it added insult to his injury that many brand new young comics who didn't have that much experience and were much greener did book this particular show.
Its funny, because I have learned a lot in my last 18 years of doing this. As my buddy felt that his career was not going well, my instant thought was that because he didn't book this show, he is going to be a real star, with the depth to handle it on deeper levels as a person and be successful in all areas of his life. He is so lucky he did not get it. Here is why.........
As a child growing up in Seattle, I started performing in clubs when I was 12 years old. I was working full weekends all year from 15 years old on. When I moved to LA at 21 I had many years of experience and felt the 7 minute sets I would have to perform around town would be a piece of cake compared to the hour long shows I was doing in my teens.
As I started hitting the LA scene, I noticed that there were a lot of young green comics showcasing for giant comedy festivals, different late night shows, Comedy Central, etc. Many of them, some with as little as 6 months experience, were booking the shows. I felt immediately that it would be a piece of cake for me, being I had over an hour of material
and a lot of hours put in during my childhood.
I went for my first showcase for Premium Blend (a Comedy Central show that breaks comedians) when I was 22 and showcasing at the Laugh Factory. I was so pumped and oblivious to the idea that I would have a bad set. I knew I had this in the bag. I was 4th in the lineup. The first 3 comics were very new and their lack of experience completely
showed, making me even more pumped. When I got on stage, I completely completely crushed. I killed so hard. My instinct was that I got the show. I felt it and knew it. I few days later, my manager called me to tell me that Premium Blend had passed on me and weren't interested. I was absolutely crushed.
At 23 I showcased again. Same situation. I had the best slot (4th), 3 new comics before me......I crushed again, even harder with all new material for them. I thought for sure this time that I had it in the bag......they passed again.
Same at 24, same at 25. This also continually happened with showcases for all late night shows, and comedy festivals. To make things worse for my ego, most of the green comics WERE getting selected! I was sitting here just saying why me and its just not fair. I would sit at home depressed and bitch to other comics how ridiculously unfair this was. I also noticed now, I was feeling more strained at each showcase, adding pressure to the shows because if they didn't take me, I WOULD HAVE TO WAIT A WHOLE YEAR!
The day after getting passed on by Comedy Central again when I was 26, I was at home sad. Then, by some kind of magic, thought just came into my mind out of nowhere. It was just a quick thought. But it was step 1 and a symbolic thought that would start a transformation that has been taking place in my life and will forever.
The thought was this....."Wait a minute, each year that I don't get picked, I get to write and develop for a whole extra year of practice." Holy crap! What a thought.......well this thought propelled me to a positive mood. I went with it. I allowed myself to feel that mood and use it to motivate me. I said to myself, lets just write for a while....and I did, I wrote and wrote and wrote. Went up every night and started killing. Even harder then I had been killing before (for the non comics, killing means doing really well at shows, which is funny, because bombing means the opposite.)
At 27 I showcased for Premium Blend with a new attitude. My immediate thought was actually this. "Man, I hope I don't get this because I can practice for another year and get better if they pass!" Well, this attitude is exactly what caused me to book Premium Blend. That's right, I booked it, because I realized there was more to me then this one
show, I didn't care and went up freely under no pressure, and that made me
better.
The funny backwards thing is, now that I booked it, my new thought was, "WOW! I hope I am really ready?" How crazy is that? At 22 I thought I had it in the bag, now, with 5 more years experience I wasn't sure if I was ready. The reason is now that I saw this differently....I have one shot on Comedy Central. BETTER NOT BLOW IT! As I started picturing subconsiously numerous ways to screw up.....I developed my first anxiety. I now felt I wasn't quite ready for this appearance which I was about to shoot in 3 months.
This anxiety grew and grew and grew. I was in absolute hell just imagining everything I worked for getting ruined by me bombing on Premium Blend. Luckily I had a great set, but I had a new conditioned anxiety in my body I needed to get rid of. I started listening to different thought tapes, and reading self help books. It was in this process that I learned so much. I learned things I had no idea about, but more amazing, I learned things that I didn't know, that I didn't know. All these lessons came into my life that I wasn't even aware I needed to learn. These lessons have completely changed the way I have been thinking, living, breathing, eating, performing, talking to people around me, feeling everything.
The instinctual way that I think now has made me see that we have no problems. We do not have problems. The only thing that makes something a problem is the meaning that you give it. NOTHING IS A PROBLEM. Its not the event that happens, its what you do with it. We immediately ask ourselves questions every second. If a bad thing happens to you and your question to yourself is, "why me?" Then your body will immediately answer you. "Because you suck, because you aren't worthy of her, because you are fat, because no one loves you." Etc.......
What if the question you asked when something "bad" happens is "what can I do with this?" Or "How can I do something now that will make my life better because this happened." You will find that it will change everything. I do this so much that it is now part of my subconsious to ask this question immediately. I haven't had one stressed out, or sad day for about 9 months now. Because every bad thing that happens is empowering me.
I am asking that question with extreme things too, and the greatest example was this winter, my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer. Now to her immediately she felt fear and felt like she could die soon......I got excited. The meaning I gave this is that my mom is going to live a lot longer. Why? Because to kill the cancer, she was going to have to learn a lot about her body, health, thought process, and herself.
Well thank god I had not booked premium blend at 22 because I would have gotten comfortable and never been driven to learn any of these lessons. I would have sat at home, in an ego state, not growing as a person. Because I didn't book Premium Blend at 22 I was able to teach what I have learned to the people around me, including my mom, who was very receptive to it. And now, not only is the cancer gone, but she now
loves yoga, breathing exercises, and is a vegetarian. She has not felt this euphoric in years, and is extremely thankful that she got the cancer to wake her up as a person.
Because I didn't get Premium Blend at 22, my mom will live the rest of her life very happy and healthy.
Everyone around me is making these changes and I am now finding myself chosing friends who have this positive mentality. All because I didn't get premium blend at 22 and because I went through an anxiety at 27. My mom is going to live longer because she got cancer. This list can go on for eternity. I was able to share it with my buddy last night and now
he can apply it too. We can change the meaning of the problem.
Think if you are a democrat, how great it is to have Bush in the office. Now the world is waking up and getting driven, there are going to be more voters then ever because many people are fed up. This might not have happened if everything was ok. If the war is bothering you, instead of dwelling on it, and sitting at home sad, use it to get off
your ass and campaign for a change. This works with all parties and everything there is.......
As I have adapted this new way of thinking,
1. I lost 50 pounds,
2. I perform much better on stage.
3. I can empower myself and the people around me.
4. My success has helped me to buy a house.
5. I am not penetrated by bull shit.
6. My body is at maximum health.
7. I used to be a huge clutter bug, now I am not. I am really clean
and have a new appreciation for my things.
8. I am finding a new level of confidence in who I am as a person and don't feel the need to prove myself to people when I meet them....taking me to a higher caliber as a person.
9. I am able to go out with more enlightened, successful women (although I still find myself unable to shut up when I am talking to one I really like.) I am also gaining the skills to understand why women are crazy (that's a joke, calm down women)
11. I was sick once in the last 2 years.
12. The list is truly eternal.
My talk with my buddy was incredible and he said he was so happy and thankful that we had it. He is now excited to take on this year, and really rip the stage apart next year, so his show will be 10 times what it would have been this year. As he said he was happy he didn't get it, I pointed out on a deeper level, "Be happy that you learned this.
Think of the endless possibilities you can have with this mind set." He learned this lesson because he didn't get that show.
You can do what you want with this info. I find people who are skeptical are not happy people. Almost all really successful (in all areas of life) people would absolutely agree with this. If they got bummed everytime something bad happened, they wouldn't be successful.
Life would be nothing without problems. Without problems we would have nothing to overcome and wouldn't grow as people. No matter what level you are at, people need growth to live. So next time something "terrible" happens to you, get excited because you are about to grow and learn something you didn't know you needed to know.
PS....If you do know anyone is is sad about an event, ill, depressed, angry, etc, please forward this to them.
--kylecease
Last night I had dinner with one of my closest friends who is a phenominal comedian and a great person. As we started talking, he told me that he was really bummed out that he had not booked a tv show that comedians go on. Aside from the fact that he is clearly ready for this show, it added insult to his injury that many brand new young comics who didn't have that much experience and were much greener did book this particular show.
Its funny, because I have learned a lot in my last 18 years of doing this. As my buddy felt that his career was not going well, my instant thought was that because he didn't book this show, he is going to be a real star, with the depth to handle it on deeper levels as a person and be successful in all areas of his life. He is so lucky he did not get it. Here is why.........
As a child growing up in Seattle, I started performing in clubs when I was 12 years old. I was working full weekends all year from 15 years old on. When I moved to LA at 21 I had many years of experience and felt the 7 minute sets I would have to perform around town would be a piece of cake compared to the hour long shows I was doing in my teens.
As I started hitting the LA scene, I noticed that there were a lot of young green comics showcasing for giant comedy festivals, different late night shows, Comedy Central, etc. Many of them, some with as little as 6 months experience, were booking the shows. I felt immediately that it would be a piece of cake for me, being I had over an hour of material
and a lot of hours put in during my childhood.
I went for my first showcase for Premium Blend (a Comedy Central show that breaks comedians) when I was 22 and showcasing at the Laugh Factory. I was so pumped and oblivious to the idea that I would have a bad set. I knew I had this in the bag. I was 4th in the lineup. The first 3 comics were very new and their lack of experience completely
showed, making me even more pumped. When I got on stage, I completely completely crushed. I killed so hard. My instinct was that I got the show. I felt it and knew it. I few days later, my manager called me to tell me that Premium Blend had passed on me and weren't interested. I was absolutely crushed.
At 23 I showcased again. Same situation. I had the best slot (4th), 3 new comics before me......I crushed again, even harder with all new material for them. I thought for sure this time that I had it in the bag......they passed again.
Same at 24, same at 25. This also continually happened with showcases for all late night shows, and comedy festivals. To make things worse for my ego, most of the green comics WERE getting selected! I was sitting here just saying why me and its just not fair. I would sit at home depressed and bitch to other comics how ridiculously unfair this was. I also noticed now, I was feeling more strained at each showcase, adding pressure to the shows because if they didn't take me, I WOULD HAVE TO WAIT A WHOLE YEAR!
The day after getting passed on by Comedy Central again when I was 26, I was at home sad. Then, by some kind of magic, thought just came into my mind out of nowhere. It was just a quick thought. But it was step 1 and a symbolic thought that would start a transformation that has been taking place in my life and will forever.
The thought was this....."Wait a minute, each year that I don't get picked, I get to write and develop for a whole extra year of practice." Holy crap! What a thought.......well this thought propelled me to a positive mood. I went with it. I allowed myself to feel that mood and use it to motivate me. I said to myself, lets just write for a while....and I did, I wrote and wrote and wrote. Went up every night and started killing. Even harder then I had been killing before (for the non comics, killing means doing really well at shows, which is funny, because bombing means the opposite.)
At 27 I showcased for Premium Blend with a new attitude. My immediate thought was actually this. "Man, I hope I don't get this because I can practice for another year and get better if they pass!" Well, this attitude is exactly what caused me to book Premium Blend. That's right, I booked it, because I realized there was more to me then this one
show, I didn't care and went up freely under no pressure, and that made me
better.
The funny backwards thing is, now that I booked it, my new thought was, "WOW! I hope I am really ready?" How crazy is that? At 22 I thought I had it in the bag, now, with 5 more years experience I wasn't sure if I was ready. The reason is now that I saw this differently....I have one shot on Comedy Central. BETTER NOT BLOW IT! As I started picturing subconsiously numerous ways to screw up.....I developed my first anxiety. I now felt I wasn't quite ready for this appearance which I was about to shoot in 3 months.
This anxiety grew and grew and grew. I was in absolute hell just imagining everything I worked for getting ruined by me bombing on Premium Blend. Luckily I had a great set, but I had a new conditioned anxiety in my body I needed to get rid of. I started listening to different thought tapes, and reading self help books. It was in this process that I learned so much. I learned things I had no idea about, but more amazing, I learned things that I didn't know, that I didn't know. All these lessons came into my life that I wasn't even aware I needed to learn. These lessons have completely changed the way I have been thinking, living, breathing, eating, performing, talking to people around me, feeling everything.
The instinctual way that I think now has made me see that we have no problems. We do not have problems. The only thing that makes something a problem is the meaning that you give it. NOTHING IS A PROBLEM. Its not the event that happens, its what you do with it. We immediately ask ourselves questions every second. If a bad thing happens to you and your question to yourself is, "why me?" Then your body will immediately answer you. "Because you suck, because you aren't worthy of her, because you are fat, because no one loves you." Etc.......
What if the question you asked when something "bad" happens is "what can I do with this?" Or "How can I do something now that will make my life better because this happened." You will find that it will change everything. I do this so much that it is now part of my subconsious to ask this question immediately. I haven't had one stressed out, or sad day for about 9 months now. Because every bad thing that happens is empowering me.
I am asking that question with extreme things too, and the greatest example was this winter, my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer. Now to her immediately she felt fear and felt like she could die soon......I got excited. The meaning I gave this is that my mom is going to live a lot longer. Why? Because to kill the cancer, she was going to have to learn a lot about her body, health, thought process, and herself.
Well thank god I had not booked premium blend at 22 because I would have gotten comfortable and never been driven to learn any of these lessons. I would have sat at home, in an ego state, not growing as a person. Because I didn't book Premium Blend at 22 I was able to teach what I have learned to the people around me, including my mom, who was very receptive to it. And now, not only is the cancer gone, but she now
loves yoga, breathing exercises, and is a vegetarian. She has not felt this euphoric in years, and is extremely thankful that she got the cancer to wake her up as a person.
Because I didn't get Premium Blend at 22, my mom will live the rest of her life very happy and healthy.
Everyone around me is making these changes and I am now finding myself chosing friends who have this positive mentality. All because I didn't get premium blend at 22 and because I went through an anxiety at 27. My mom is going to live longer because she got cancer. This list can go on for eternity. I was able to share it with my buddy last night and now
he can apply it too. We can change the meaning of the problem.
Think if you are a democrat, how great it is to have Bush in the office. Now the world is waking up and getting driven, there are going to be more voters then ever because many people are fed up. This might not have happened if everything was ok. If the war is bothering you, instead of dwelling on it, and sitting at home sad, use it to get off
your ass and campaign for a change. This works with all parties and everything there is.......
As I have adapted this new way of thinking,
1. I lost 50 pounds,
2. I perform much better on stage.
3. I can empower myself and the people around me.
4. My success has helped me to buy a house.
5. I am not penetrated by bull shit.
6. My body is at maximum health.
7. I used to be a huge clutter bug, now I am not. I am really clean
and have a new appreciation for my things.
8. I am finding a new level of confidence in who I am as a person and don't feel the need to prove myself to people when I meet them....taking me to a higher caliber as a person.
9. I am able to go out with more enlightened, successful women (although I still find myself unable to shut up when I am talking to one I really like.) I am also gaining the skills to understand why women are crazy (that's a joke, calm down women)
11. I was sick once in the last 2 years.
12. The list is truly eternal.
My talk with my buddy was incredible and he said he was so happy and thankful that we had it. He is now excited to take on this year, and really rip the stage apart next year, so his show will be 10 times what it would have been this year. As he said he was happy he didn't get it, I pointed out on a deeper level, "Be happy that you learned this.
Think of the endless possibilities you can have with this mind set." He learned this lesson because he didn't get that show.
You can do what you want with this info. I find people who are skeptical are not happy people. Almost all really successful (in all areas of life) people would absolutely agree with this. If they got bummed everytime something bad happened, they wouldn't be successful.
Life would be nothing without problems. Without problems we would have nothing to overcome and wouldn't grow as people. No matter what level you are at, people need growth to live. So next time something "terrible" happens to you, get excited because you are about to grow and learn something you didn't know you needed to know.
PS....If you do know anyone is is sad about an event, ill, depressed, angry, etc, please forward this to them.
--kylecease
