Submit a Link
Love/Hate With Brido: I Love The New Millenium
I Love The New Millenium
VH-1 has run out of nostalgia. They’ve gone to the Hal Sparks Well once to often and are now trotting out old crap from four years ago and trying to pass it off as entertainment. It doesn’t work. And I hate it. Here’s why…
1. You can’t be nostalgic about last year.
Remember iPhones? Remember MySpace? Remember when George W. Bush was President? I mean, holy shit. There’s a big difference between seeing the actual excitement on the faces of the talking heads when they discussed “Saved by the Bell” or Guns n’ Roses or something they cared about in their own adolescence. Now they’re just launching in to half-assed, who-gives-a-shit discussions about trucker hats and “The O.C.” You think people are excited to talk about Razor Scooters? No. The fakeness has never been more palpable.
A lot of their talking heads are comics, which means they probably had jokes about some of this shit five years ago and have long since tossed them aside to do more relevant material. I had jokes about TiVo, Yao Ming and Saddam Hussein getting captured too. I don’t still do them, because nobody gives a shit anymore. The ‘relevancy’ window is closed and the nostalgia window isn’t gonna open for a while.
2. Everything is disposable. And I don’t like to think about it.
This show makes it even more evident that nothing matters anymore. Everything sucks. Everything is stupid. And everything lasts 10 minutes. Remember Joe Millionaire? Remember Sigfield and Roy’s tiger incident? When is the last time you thought about that? You haven’t.
But in 2003 you probably had 100 mindless conversations about that. That was five years ago and you probably give zero shit about either thing now. When hippies or weirdos say things like “Pop culture is a means the government uses to distract us from the real issues,” I usually dismiss them for smelling like garbage. But this show proves how true that probably is. And I hate when hippies and weirdos are right.
Look at all the dumb shit we cared about in 2001 and 2002. Liza Minnelli married David Gest. Who gives a fuck? We did, apparently. Why? Because we were sick of being scared shitless of Muslims. This goddamned show reminds me even more that I’m being distracted.
3. It’s just terrible, period.
“Hey VH1, You’re Fired.” “You are the Weakest Link.” “The Tribe Has Spoken.” “That is My Final Answer.”
