8 Questions Bidders Should Ask Themselves About Natalie Dylan, the Girl Auctioning Off Her Virginity
This is Natalie Dylan, the girl auctioning off her virginity on the Bunny Ranch website to pay for her college loans. Here are questions bidders should ask Natalie Dylan, the Girl Auctioning Off Her Virginity.
8. Do we have to do it at the Bunny Ranch?
We saw that show “Cathouse” on HBO and that place gives us the creeps. And we have a suspicion that the fat owner guy, Dennis Hoff, finds a way to watch. *Shudder*
7. Am I the worst person alive?
You’re obviously very wealthy. Should you give your money to charity or scientific research? No! Fuck those people! You need to give tens of thousands of dollars away because you’ve had sex with hookers… but not any virgin hookers. Classy.
6. What is this for, again?
Natalie Dylan said she plans on being a marriage and family counselor. No. Nobody wants any advice on anything from you. This won’t help you get a counseling career. This is only going to jump start your career as a fancy prostitute. Except your rate will go down as soon as that V Card is cashed in.
5. Am I Charlie Sheen or Todd McFarlane?
That McFarlane guy paid millions for steroid home run balls. Maybe that Spawn money is burning a hole in his pocket again. He clearly has no idea what to do with money. And Charlie Sheen is always a good guess when it comes to a high dollar prostitute purchases.
4. How do I convert my money from Dubai into U.S. dollars?
Nobody likes virgins more than billionaire Middle Easterners. And nobody spends money on dumb shit like Dubai. Dubai might actually shut down until the bidding is over.
3. How many times has she seen “Pretty Woman”?
Hopefully that number is below 5 because, if not, she’s gonna expect things. Like a shopping spree and respect. And that’s not part of the deal!
2. Am I Ashley Dupree?
Come on, Ashley Dupree! You can’t have some rookie stealing all of your thunder as the world’s most famous prosti. Get in there and bid! The only way you can keep your ‘most famous hooker’ title is to deflower this girl yourself. It’s not like you’re above this.
1. Is she one of those anal-only virgins?
That’s a valid question. She’s 22 and clearly troubled. How do we know she’s not taken years and years of backdoor action? You wouldn’t pay top dollar for a new house if the front door was brand new, but the back yard got destroyed by a runaway dump truck.
Comedy.com’s ListMaster is Mike Bridenstine. He’d pay $40. But no more.
Tags: ashley dupree, auctioning virginity, bunny ranch, Dennis Hoff, famous prostitute, howard stern, Natalie dylan, prostitution, sex, virginity
September 13th, 2008 at 8:34 pm
[...] 8 Questions Bidders Should Ask Themselves About Natalie Dylan, the … [...]
September 17th, 2008 at 8:19 am
Porn star in the making!!!
January 12th, 2009 at 7:23 pm
Point 1, “runaway dump truck” - awesome, I love it!
January 15th, 2009 at 4:43 pm
Grow the fuck up dudes, the choice is hers and hers alone. If she wants to sell her body off then let her, I’m thinking your all just jealous cause you can’t afford her your selves. Shes willing to take a test to confirm the fact that she is a virgin, as well as a lie detection test.. so she’s making sure the buyers investment is in fact sound. Its gotta be at that brothel cause its LEGAL at that place and they are HOLDING the auction for her. And yes it does look bad for her patients if they know she’s done this.. but I’d still go to her for advice cause I’d base it off of the one thing that actually matters Is she smart and knowledgeable in the needed topic, and Id betting she will be at that point too. I mean it is none of yours or my business what she has done in the past. You guys really need to get a fucking life if all you got to do with your time is bashing a young women for using her body ( which is a very very nice body in my opinion ) to make money for a very noble cause.. not only will she use the money to finish her schooling but shes also using it to assist her sister in finishing schooling as well. If you were a women and you had a damn nice body and you were offered a million Plus dollars to give up your virginity Im betting you would, hell im pretty old fashioned but I know I WOULD… you’d be pretty fucking stupid not too.. a mill could keep you more then comfortable for the rest of your life.
I’ll be surprised if you idiots actually post this comment on your site unedited. ( id be cool if you took out the bad words )
Thnxs,
Ryan
January 18th, 2009 at 11:53 pm
i just took a dump that honest to god smelled like cat shit - and i havent eaten cat food since 1991. i’m quite concerned about this, cause last time my boyfriend was kissing me, he pat me a few times on my lower back and i jacked my ass up in the air like i was in heat. am i turning into a kitten?
January 22nd, 2009 at 11:24 am
Is it her choice to do this? Yea, and based on that, who cares. She is just some hoe who is enjoying her 15 minutes of fame and would rather do this the trashy way then take out a student loan and work it off. So be it. However, Ryan, you stated that her future patients should base their decision to hire her purely on her knowlege and education…just wondering….when did you get back to earth? This world is fickel. And the bottom line is, EVERYONE will hear about this and know who she is, and guess what, it will hurt her career. What professional couple will want any form of advice from a prostitute? Be realistic here. She is incredibly ignorant to think that this will have no bearing on her future whatsoever. If I were to spend my $100 an hour for therapy, would I chose the person who worked her butt off and put herself through school, who was private about her sex life and presented herself with class…or the online hooker? Be realistic. All she will ever be known for is this, and it will become her stigma. Men will never take her seriously as a therapist, and the only ones making appointments will be the ones who will just be there to proposition her for sex. I don’t really care about her at all really, what I do care about is her presenting herself as an object and justifying this as being ok. All she is saying here is, I have no brain, but I do have a hymen, so you can put a dollar sign on that because my body is really only here for that purpose. It is pitiful. It sickens me that she sees this as empowerment, it makes me wonder how she got accepted into a college in the first place.
January 22nd, 2009 at 6:21 pm
This is a scam and i hope she gets scam in the process. this girl REFUSE to get a medial examination. ONLY agreed and completed a lie dector test which can be altered and passed. she could have gotten surgery to get it back like a virgin which is possible….. PEOPLE DONT BID ON THIS SCAM she is not a VIRGIN…..if she is undergo exam to prove it………