Groaners Jokes
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The Woman and the Leprechaun
A woman was driving down a country lane at night when someone walks into the middle of the road. The woman hits him. She stops the c... Three Men Walking in the Desert Three men were walking in the desert. One was carrying a bottle of water and one was holding a unbrella. The other man was caryying ... The Dumb Survivalist In Denver, a man built a nuclear weapons shelter during the cold war, in case Denver was taken over by troops. He also had a nuclear... The Tatooed Penis One day a man got his wife Wendy's name tatooed on his penis. He went home to show her and she said,"Why does it say "wy" on your pe... Grandma Tells a Funny Story One day I asked my grandma to tell me something funny. she told me; One day, a woman went to the pharmacy and said, "Sir, could you ... Ethels return An old lady was sitting on her verandah one day ,contemplating her bygone years, when suddenly her Fairy Godmother appeared. "Dear E... The Man with No Ears A man called Damian had an accident and his ears got chopped off. Damian owns a buisness and there was a position open. He advertise... Who Thinks They Are Stupid After an unsuccesful football game, the coach asked the players, "Who thinks they are stupid?". For a while no one stood up. Then on... The Little Girl Argues with Teacher A little girl was at school arguing with her teacher. The teacher was trying to explain to the class that a whales throat is really ... Where Did I Come From One day, a boy asked his father, "Where did I come from?" His father answered, "Well...you see, It all happened when your mother and... A Blind Man Buys Sunglasses A deaf guy goes into a store and wants to buy a toothbrush so he uses his hands and acts like he is brushing his teeth. The storekee... The Boy Named Bootyitch There once was a boy named Bootyitch. Bootyitch went to a new school and his teacher asked, "What is your name?" He replied, "My nam... The Man Who Loved Beans There was this guy and he wanted to marry his girlfriend but he had a problem, he loved beans, but his girl didn't like the aftermat... Why do Women Skydivers Wear Tampons Why do woman skydivers wear tampons? The Fat Woman at Church My boss came into work one Monday with a fat lip. I asked him what happened and he said, "Well, I was in church yesterday and there ... A Movie Called 'Constipated' Have you ever heard of the movie 'Constipated?' No, beacause it hasn't come out yet. What Do You Call an Upside Down Blonde What do you call an upside down blonde? Travis Gets His Punishment from God A hot guy named Travis died one day and God said to him, "You did some bad things when you were alive and I am going to punish you."... Fond of Detective Novels A dumb guy was very fond of detective novels, but he always started reading from the middle. A friend of his asked why he did so. "I... The Most Ping Pong Balls There once were three friends and they were the greatest friends ever, but they were always in competition with each other. One day,... Bad Time of Year This time of the year always brings sad memories. It was three years ago today I lost my wife and kids. No, I'll never forget that p... A Guy Goes to the Doctor A guy walks into his doctors office and says, "I have been having real bad headaches Doc, can you help me figure out what to do?" Th... Three Guys Going to Jail Once there were three guys who were going to jail. Each of them could bring only one item with them. When the prisoners got on the b... A Dog Bites a Man There are two men and a dog standing at the bus stop. One man looks at the other man and asks him, "Sir, does your dog bite?" He rep... What is the Fastest Thing Four men are in a training class. The professor asks the first man, "What is the fastest thing you know?" He replied, "Thoughts, th... |
